Tuning Slide #5.25- Professional Action

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens.
— Carl Jung

Last week I talked about being a professional or procrastinating? Part of it was based on this article by Mayo Oshin.

There she gave a two-part answer to how to become (and stay) “pro”:

◆ Thou shalt commit to a schedule.
A schedule is simply a pre-commitment to consistently put in your ‘reps’ and hours in your craft. Just like any new habit, your willpower and ability to delay gratification will also affect your consistency levels.

◆ Thou shalt believe that thou art ‘Pro.’
This is why it’s so important to shift your identity. You have the power right now to believe that you’re a professional. [But] To say that you believe you’re a pro isn’t enough because actions speak louder than words. Prove to yourself that you’re really a pro and do the things that a pro would do every day.

I then concluded that I have recently been guilty of procrastination. Being inspired by her directions, I said I needed to answer three final questions from Oshin’s article. So let’s see what happens.

◆ Am I committed to being a professional in any area of my life?
Two old statements I’ve used before came to mind as I worked on this:

• How you do anything is how you do everything and, from author Annie Dillard,
• How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.

What these both mean is simple and two-pronged. First, it isn’t in whether I say I want to be professional at something, it’s whether I am truly committed to it. True commitment means action, it means doing the things that lead to becoming professional. I have worked at that over these past 5-6 years and it has been exciting. I know it can be exciting and rewarding to get beyond my amateur mindset because I have done it in my life in other things, namely my careers and my commitment to a recovery lifestyle. I was not- and am not- just playing with those, I am committed to them. I have taken the time to do the preparatory work beyond just the basics. I have worked at improvement on a weekly, even daily basis. If my preaching after 30 years or my counseling after 25 hasn’t improved, well, I have not become professional. I have not done the deliberate practice.

This also says that I have been willing to commit to what is important to me in these areas, then I can do it in other things. I suppose I could do it in everything, but that would take up far more than the standard 24-hour/168-hour week. Other things can be hobbies, interests, likes- but I can’t spend the time to become “pro” in all of them. But I have become a professional, therefore I can do it. It can be how I spend my life. That means I can honestly answer “yes” to the first question. (By the way, it is always a good idea to take some time to reflect on this question about many things. Am I still committed to this particular professional area? Is it still a driving force of my life? That’s why I am still not 100% retired!)

◆ Is there anything holding me back from going pro?
Ah, now the self-reflection needs to get into deep honesty. There can be all kinds of answers to this, some of which might even indicate that one might need to look at NOT becoming “pro” in that area. That’s back at the commitment level. But having answered that question first, we can look at other things. A few that I have discovered over the years and in the past week include:
✓ Fear of failure
✓ Being overcommitted, i.e. not being able to say “No!” to myself or others
✓ Procrastination
✓ Having too many interests and hobbies
✓ Boredom with the mundane routine of every day
✓ Getting easily distrac… Squirrel
✓ Procrastination
✓ Self-Esteem
✓ Putting off until tomorrow what I should be doing today. (Procrastination!)

When I reach a procrastination point, that does not mean that I am in failure mode. It usually means that in one or more areas I am at a “stuck-point” or a “plateau.” When I move to the next question I can begin to put these in some order of what must be done while the stuck-point or the plateau is happening.

◆ What can I do to create the schedule and identity of a pro?
Now, the whole quote from Annie Dillard hits just as hard as the initial quote we usually hear.

How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives. What we do with this hour, and that one, is what we are doing. A schedule defends from chaos and whim. It is a net for catching days. It is a scaffolding on which a worker can stand and labor with both hands at sections of time. A schedule is a mock-up of reason and order—willed, faked, and so brought into being; it is a peace and a haven set into the wreck of time; it is a lifeboat on which you find yourself, decades later, still living.

So last week I sat down and did the first step of a schedule, I made a list of the different projects and areas of my days (how I live my life!) and listed what needs to be done. That helps focus me, ease my distractability. If it’s written down it is less likely to get missed. I don’t call this a “To-Do” list. It is the raw material that tells me what is ahead, what deadlines I have made for myself, and allows me to do some planning of how much time needs to be spent at it. Once I get this I can now begin to think about how I want to do the schedule. I now see the skeleton of the day coming into being. I can put a timeline on some of them. For example, I need to have the Tuning Slide post done every week by Monday evening, latest. I need to take the time every day to practice trumpet. I have a monthly deadline for a book-writing group that requires writing and research. And so on…

That has helped me move beyond the plateau. I can now put some time frames on these. I know how much time I need and want to spend on my music routine. I know how much time I want to give to my physical fitness routine. I know what my different writing gigs will take. That means it’s time to move on. Stop worrying about the stuck-point or procrastination. I have a hunch I needed this time to put these all together in a new perspective.

As yourself, am I doing my “professional” stuff effectively? Am I putting my action and commitment together? Then make the plans- be deliberate. And, well, just do it.

Tuning Slide 4.47- Being Free #3

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way.
If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.

Jim Rohn

Two weeks ago I started a series based on a blog post at Planet of Success by Steve Mueller. It is about 10 powerful ways to free yourself if you are stuck. I took the concepts and riffed on them from my own experiences in the last 8-10 years to overcome self-defeating attitudes that kept me from changing and growing in my trumpet playing. Here are the themes of the previous two weeks:

1. Face your fears
2. Break your routine
3. Effect change, one step at a time
4. Overcome the perception of impossibilities
5. Be honest with yourself
6. Change your perspective

This week we will look at four more. And as always, my thoughts are in italics.

7. Differentiate between feeling and fact
✓ The inability to get unstuck may feel very real, but in the end, it’s just a feeling. And this very feeling creates our perception of the situation. For this reason, it’s important to remind yourself that feelings are not facts.

Try to look at your situation more objectively. Emotional responses might cloud your perception of reality.

Feelings… or facts? Most of the time we are willing to base our “facts” on “feelings”, even if we think they are really, truly, honestly, facts. Since I have been using my Memorial Day experience from high school as the basis of my “facts” it was hard to say that I was going on feelings. It was a clearly obvious “fact” that first, I am not as good a trumpet player as I like to think I am, and second, that I am bad at auditions. Just look at the visible signs of that on that Memorial Day and then when I didn’t get into the college marching band after a poor audition.

But the facts were different. I was not a less skilled trumpet player because I had problems with Taps on that holiday. It may be that I was careless, or just plain human and capable of error, but skill? No way. Blowing the audition surely showed I let things go downhill when faced with pressure. Never mind that they most likely had enough trumpets and didn’t need a freshman- I was simply not good enough I told me. The fact was I could do it, in both situations, but for the next few decades, you couldn’t have convinced me- until I found some facts and began to move forward. Unstuck.

8. Avoid blaming others
✓ It’s relatively easy to blame others when we feel stuck. While this is a great strategy to maintain peace of mind, it will contribute nothing to the solution of your problem.

Even though you’d like to find an external cause for your situation, try to seek that cause within yourself first. Try to take control over your life by not seeking the fault for your problems in others.

I didn’t face this issue in my situation with my music. I knew it was all my fault and therefore I couldn’t do it. But it is a difficult issue to face. We can always find someone else to blame. I could have blamed the tiredness of having marched to the cemetery for my error; I could have said that the person doing my audition was too intimidating; I could have said they didn’t know what they were doing. That might have prevented some of the attitudes I developed, but they would have kept me stuck because once it happens, it will happen again. The next time it will be because they did it. No matter how you look at it, getting stuck is still getting stuck.

9. Stop comparing yourself to others
✓ While we think we compare ourselves in an objective manner, quite the contrary is the case…. In most situations, we take our weakest spots and compared these with people who are above-average in this area.

If you’re feeling stuck in life, try not to measure your life’s worth based on other people’s accomplishments. Measure your life based upon your own standards. Don’t just mindlessly adopt society’s definition of success, find your very own.

You can always find someone who has different, more, or even greater skills than you do. If I always compare myself to Maynard, Miles, or Doc, I will always fall short. Therefore I am not good enough. It’s an old saying that the only person to compare yourself to is you- yesterday. Have you improved since yesterday? If you haven’t, then do something different- the whole gist of this series on getting unstuck. These ways of getting unstuck are really just ways to change our perspective and find the new ways to see what you or I have done and can do. If playing as good as Doc or Miles is the measure of success, forget it. None of us would ever be successful. But stop- what if Miles had said, I can’t be as good as Satchmo? How much poorer the music world would be.

10. Stop making excuses
✓ Excuses keep us from moving forward in life.
Don’t focus on all the different reasons that keep you stuck. Shift your attention to what needs to be done to effect positive change.

That pretty much sums it up! Make the change.

Mueller then completes the 10 steps with the call to do it yourself:

In the end, the only one that is holding you back is yourself. Do not fall prey to the mistake of focusing all your attention on lousy excuses. Look for the steps you can take that will get you out of your situation.

Get past the excuses this week. Take one more step and make a move. It’s not as hard as it feels- or we make it out to be.

Tuning Slide 4.46- Being Free #2

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you will keep getting what you’ve always gotten.
— Various

Last week I started a series based on a blog post at Planet of Success. It is about 10 powerful ways to free yourself if you are stuck. I took the concepts and riffed on them from my own experiences in the last 8-10 years to overcome self-defeating attitudes that kept me from changing and growing in my trumpet playing. Last week I looked at the first three:
1. Face your fears
2. Break your routine
3. Effect change, one step at a time

This week we take the next three and see where they can take us as we work to keep from staying stuck. Again, my thoughts are in italics.

4. Overcome the perception of impossibilities
✓ Feeling stuck in life … paralyzes us and diminishes our ability to see exciting new opportunities. Instead, we feel as if the options at hand are impossible to execute. If every solution you can think of seems impossible to accomplish, you’ll get even more stuck. … no progress can be made. nstead of getting trapped by these thinking patterns, try to explore your options… [T]ry to find the one solution that you like the most and commit to the decision.

It is not impossible to start a new career at least twice in one’s lifetime. Nor is it really too late to do it. I have seen many people over the years just kind of waste away into retirement- and spend many years moving toward it. It is not impossible to find new opportunities. As I have talked about with my trumpet playing, I was convinced that it would be impossible at my age (any age after about 40), to do anything about my shortcomings. Fortunately, I was wrong.

5. Be honest with yourself
✓ If we do want to break free from being stuck, it’s necessary to be honest with ourselves. Astonishingly, we almost always have the answer within ourselves. It might take some time to discover it, but it’s always there. The problem is that we do not act upon this knowledge. We prefer to keep this answer locked within ourselves.
Have the courage to at least think about the possible solution. It might be challenging to even consider acknowledging that you took a wrong path in life. But ultimately, it might prove to be better than suffering from this decision for the rest of your life.

Honesty. I have talked about this as part of the trio of honesty, openness, and willingness. The first honesty is to call BS on yourself when you say “I can’t do that!” or when we say “I don’t know what to do. It’s beyond me!” Neither is true. Because I had that moment of uncertainty at age 18, it does not mean I can’t do it now. Because I am trained in one area of life doesn’t mean I can’t get new training in my mid-40s or mid-60s for that matter. Admit that the biggest obstacle to getting where you want to go is YOU. That’s the first step of courage. The second is to say, “… and I don’t have to continue to block my own way!”

6. Change your perspective
✓ When we feel stuck in life, we most certainly do not have a good overview of the situation. Unfortunately, the feeling of being stuck in a rut can heavily affect our perception of life. It’s time to broaden your perspective!

▪ Stop walking the same path you’ve always chosen.
▪ Explore new perspectives by taking other paths.
▪ Ask yourself what your real goals are.
▪ Explore what you’re passionate about.
▪ Discover what it is that truly energizes you.
▪ Find your true purpose in life.
▪ Challenge yourself to have a vision for your life.

Discovering your vision and the pursuit of your passions can create a powerful drive. It can help you to liberate yourself from the vicious circle of being stuck.

That list above says more than I can absorb in a few moments. In essence, it replays that old cliche that if you keep doing the same things you will keep getting the same results. As long as I said I can’t change, that people my age can’t do that, someone with my history will fail, or I don’t know how that could happen- it won’t happen. Nothing will change if I don’t change. Nothing will improve if I don’t take the steps to make the change and improvement. That means looking at life from a whole new angle and finding out what I really want to see happen.

Remembering the first three things needed to get unstuck:
1. Face your fears
2. Break your routine
3. Effect change, one step at a time.

These were the prelude to everything else. I remember being asked to join a brass quintet, which I had never done in over 40 years of playing. (All three of those.) I remember deciding to get a trumpet teacher and then asking him. (All three of those.) I remember sitting with my teacher and him mentioning music camps and my then signing up for the Shell Lake Adult Big Band Workshop. (All three of those.) That’s when this week’s list came into play.

1. Things were no longer impossible. I did things I had never done before and began to see results, changes in my playing and increases in my skills.
2. I got honest with myself. I had been getting in my own way, but I also saw where I needed help in improvements. So I asked for help. My fears had been lessened, I had broken my routine of decades. I was taking it slowly, one issue at a time.
3. My perspective was changing. For one I began to see my third career in life included music. I was actually beginning to see myself as a “musician” and not having to excuse it away. Getting involved at Shell Lake with Mr. Baca’s trumpet workshop then gave these three items even more power and direction. I could see a vision, a movement, an honesty that was refreshing and exciting!

These first six things, interacting with each other and my new experiences, were life-changing on a surface level. That is where all change begins. We act our way into a new way of thinking, one small step or change or action at a time. After that, the changes get internalized, normalized. But that’s for next week.

Last week I asked you to take time this past week to find a fear that needed to be confronted or something in your routine that can be changed. Did you find a way to make a change? In the next week

• begin to look at those from last week and how your perception is changing,
• how you are no longer getting in your own way.
• What are you still saying is impossible?

Take it deeper- and keep moving forward.

Tuning Slide 4.45- Being Free #1

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.


Confucius

Last week I re-told the story of how I got stuck on a Memorial Day 50 some years ago. It held me under its control for nearly 50 years. Every now and then I would break through a little, but only in the past six to eight years have I been able to break out of it and begin ever so slowly to move forward.

This happened in my career as a pastor when I moved from the church where I had started as a “student” pastor to my second congregation and became a “real” pastor. I discovered confidence and my own gifts. It happened again in my early career as a counselor. When I was able to do things more naturally as a counselor, I knew I had moved into a new place.

Why did it take so long with my music? It’s hard to know, but for some reason my trumpet playing always sat there in the background, while I quietly wished I could do something about it. I did not face it, until finally, I did. I never stopped playing, but I didn’t advance. So I recently went digging into how people get past those stuck points. When you reach that kind of plateau or wall, how can one break through?

I came across a website/blog called Planet of Success that calls itself a “ community designed to inspire you to live a successful life full of joy, meaning, and happiness.” I found there a post about ten powerful ways to free yourself when feeling stuck. Steve Mueller, the founder of Planet of Success, tagged the post as “comfort zone” and “limiting beliefs.” Looking at his post I knew he had presented some good insights that showed how I managed to get unstuck in my careers- and then in my music. So in this and the next three weeks, I will look at these 10 ways to get free- and stay that way.

First, so you know where we are going, here are the ten.

1. Face your fears
2. Break your routine
3. Effect change, one step at a time
4. Overcome the perception of impossibilities
5. Be honest with yourself
6. Change your perspective
7. Differentiate between feeling and fact
8. Avoid blaming others
9. Stop comparing yourself to others
10. Stop making excuses
11. Be grateful for what you have

I will look at only the first three this week in my normal way of presenting some of the original ideas and adding my riff to it. My riffs will be in italics.

1. Face your fears
✓ People are unable to move forward because they are afraid.

At some point in life, we simply became afraid of going any further…. We gave in to our fears. We allowed fear to stop our progress in life.

Everyone on this planet, and I mean really everyone, has fears. It’s not something to be ashamed of. … There’s no need to be afraid of failure. Be concerned about not having the courage to try.

In my case, my fear was that I would fail. No, my fear was I knew would fail- I was convinced I wasn’t as good as I used to think I was and people might find that out. I put everything into hiding that. In my careers, I managed to overcome that because I was able to put in all the 10,000 hours needed for expertise. I was afraid of doing that with my trumpet.

2. Break your routine
✓ Feeling stuck in life can be the result of unhealthy and restraining routines.

Developing a routine can be quite beneficial. It helps you to keep moving when the going gets tough…. Moving on in life, however, requires us to break the existing structures from time to time. … Break restricting routines whenever they need to be broken.

Actually, I had no routine to break; it was the lack of one that kept me from growing. In reality, my routine was simply to avoid confronting my personal status quo and to accept my inappropriate self-judgment. My pattern of avoidance was finally overcome only by ending up in a big band and quintet in addition to a regular concert band. It was the first time I was willing to open myself to something different. It was difficult at first. I had to learn the whole new language of actually playing jazz. I also had to move away from my comfort zone and be more visible in a quintet. That became a new routine that eventually led to even more change.

3. Effect change, one step at a time
✓ If you’re feeling stuck in life, it’s important to overcome that which prevents you from moving forward.

It’s better to tackle one problem after another than half-heartedly trying to address everything simultaneously. Not only will the sheer size of the problem overwhelm you, but it could also make you reluctant to truly free yourself.

Just don’t be too hard on yourself. Try to stick to one problem until it is solved. One problem after another. This way you can affect positive changes in your life step-by-step.

At first, I didn’t know what I was changing other than finding new things to play in new ways. Small steps, playing 4th part in the big band, beginning to practice more often with the quintet pieces. I then decided to take some lessons. Simple. Back to basics reminders. One small step that at the same time expanded my horizons.

We will expand on these ideas in the next three weeks. These are the starting points for any change that we hope to be successful in.
Start small:

◦ What is a fear you need to confront?
◦ What in your current routine may be holding you back? (Note that it is not necessarily the routine, but how you perceive it. That’s a hint of what’s to come.)
◦ What can you change in the next week to begin the small, but important change?

Tuning Slide 4.32- Beyond the Plateau

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

Plateaus are a manifestation of the law of diminishing returns, and when we reach one it simply means that it is time to adjust our methods.
― Chris Matakas, The Tao of Jiu Jitsu

Last week I talked some about the perennial problem of getting stuck in our movement forward as musicians- or in life, for that matter. I mentioned four of the main reasons that I have discovered for my “stuckness.” They were:

• Boredom
• Fear
• Exhaustion
• Lack of direction

Discovering some of these reasons behind my getting stuck may help find a way around them and into the next stage of growth. In order to do that I have to be willing and able to confront my plateaus and discover what to do next. Often what I am really facing is a decision point. In the musical world that question goes back to making a decision whether I am willing to settle for where I am. I have a hunch that any of us can always grow beyond where we are. Here is a famous quote from the great cellist Pablo Casals:

He was asked one day why he continued to practice four and five hours a day. Casals answered, “Because I think I am making progress.”
— Leonard Lyons

Who am I to disagree? So first I have to change my language to have a better, more positive way of describing the moment. Instead of being “stuck” I remind myself that I am at a “plateau.” I remember that in my past every musical or life-changing growth has been preceded by the plateau. A plateau is better than a stuck place- think flat land vs. a swamp or quicksand. Given a choice, I’ll take the flat plain. A plain or plateau tells me there is movement possible, even if for the moment it is at the same “level.” I am still moving, hopefully toward my goal.

My wife and I discussed this last week. She has been on an exercise development program following a period of medical concerns. At this point her goal was simply to walk a mile four times/week. Two days in a row she had some difficulties and I could sense she was on the edge of giving up. She was at a stuck point. I didn’t say anything specific, I just encouraged her to try it one more time. As it turns out the next time we went, she had made a step toward a better place. She was pleased and energized. She had been at the point I described last week as the “darkest before the dawn” point. She has continued to move forward.

I doing research on this topic, I found many websites that give thoughts and directions. One, the Every Day Power blog has five game-changing strategies for when you’re feeling stuck in life from Erika Boissiere. (https://everydaypowerblog.com/strategies-feeling-stuck-life/) They were:

◆ Challenge your assumptions- every last one of them!
She says that we may believe we have explored all the things that are happening. If we are still on the plateau of stuck, we probably haven’t. She suggests brainstorming more ideas, even crazy ideas. The goal is to come up with as many things as you can find. She adds, “Stop ruminating on the ideas you’ve already come up with!”

◆ Talk yourself through your worst-case scenario
Boissiere continues then to look at the worst-case options. What if this is as good as it gets? Could you continue? What might happen if you did continue? Could you survive? “If the answer is YES, you will un-tether yourself from fear of the worst case happening – and move forward.”

◆ Learn about courage
Sometimes it might take a bit of courage to move on. If fear is one of the main reasons behind this plateau, this one becomes especially important. Courage is the ability to do the next right thing, the next important thing, even if it is challenging or uncomfortable. Chances are that in my musical life, this will not kill me, that I can survive the next step and move forward anyway. For me that continues to be those solos that can trip me up. That I why I continue to play in the quintet and work on it. I am more exposed and my errors could be more devastating than playing fourth in a big band or being a section player in the concert band. Again from Boissiere, “Allow yourself to be scared. If you fall flat on your face, believe that you will pick yourself up again.”

◆ Use your village
Our individual “villages” are those people around us who we trust, who have our best interests in mind, and know something about what we are doing. So go ask them. Trust them. This what my wife did the other week when she was stuck. She trusted me and continued on her journey. It might mean finding a mentor or teacher and taking a lesson or two. Broissiere tells us to “[g]o to your strongest allies, and get their input.”

◆ Create your vision
At this point it usually comes back to what I talked about last week, make some goals, give myself some new direction. It might be learning a new piece, working on a specific technique, getting back to some basics and building on them. Broissiere remind us that “[y]ou must look beyond your short-term anxieties and create a vision for yourself.” It is, as she says, looking at the horizon instead of down at your feet. Where am I going?

I have been taking my winter season to work on these things. A few weeks ago I talked about my work on improving my precision and sound. As I said then it has been working, although there have been plateaus. That in and of itself is one of the best motivators to keep moving forward. I have also been working on my jazz language skills. I am building my vocabulary of jazz and learning how to be more free-flowing in improvising. While this may sound like it’s at odds with the “precision” goal, at this point they are beginning to merge, much to my surprise. Because I worked on my sound and attack, I feel more comfortable to working with chord changes and trusting the sound I am hearing in my mind. It all begins to meld into something new and different. My two goals are working together. They give me a direction.

Life is not a bunch of disconnected boxes. Life and music are all the things that I am and all that I can learn. I have a hunch that it is still an endless and growing path in front of me.

Tuning Slide 4.31- On Getting Stuck

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
E.M. Forster

In the past couple posts or so I have been talking about being a student, how to improve what we can do, some ways I am working on a particular direction, i.e. more precise playing. It is always exciting when I get started on something new or different. I can hardly wait to pick up my horn and do that day’s exercise and routine. That goes along well for awhile until I reach a point where I get stuck. There are two things that can happen. First, I stop progressing. While I have been doing well, hearing and feeling the changes and growth, one day it seems to just stop. Over a period of a few days I notice that there is no more change. It’s all still good and I am doing better than when I started on the new goal, but it hasn’t improved any more. My natural response to that I simple. “Well, I guess I’ve gone as far as I can go on this one. That’s it.”

Which leads almost naturally into the second thing that can happen- I feel like I’m going backwards. The sound isn’t as good as it was last week; the endurance has decreased; my range has suffered. I then become more self-critical and less motivated. I cut corners on the particular routine that I was working on and I get stuck. So I start looking around at the music in my books, the routines I have available, the etudes and lessons that I have worked on- and start practicing without a goal. It will keep my endurance up, my embouchure in shape, but it won’t necessarily improve what I’m looking to improve. I become complacent, satisfied with the status quo. While that status quo is light years from where I was even four years ago, I stop growing.

It is all in my head, sort of. Attitude and self-defeating thoughts can do a lot of damage to our growth and movement. Self 1 has taken over and is telling Self 2 that we’ve reached the end of the journey. We can’t go any further down the road. Just sit back and take it easy.

In the end, when you feel like you have gotten stuck, just move on. In order to move on I usually do the following:

◆ I remind myself why I am playing trumpet in the first place- and why I have continued to play and to find ways to grow in these 57 years since I got my first trumpet. It’s all about the music!
◆ I remember the line if you don’t like playing long tones, you don’t like playing the trumpet for its own sake. If it’s all about the music, it’s also all about the sound!
◆ I then remind myself of something that I wrote about way back in the earlier days of this blog- that one often reaches a plateau or even a step backwards just as one is about to make the next move forward. I call that darkest before the dawn theory of growth. Just when you think you can’t continue- you can. With deliberate practice and direction.

The “Aha!” moment has been reached and I can take a look at what has happened, what I have accomplished, and where I can go. It’s at that point I discover a number of things about myself and my growth. I get stuck when one or more of the following things get in the way

◆ Boredom
Playing those long tones and scales can get very dull. Boredom is actually the inability to find the new that is right in front of you. Boredom is unmet expectations telling you that this is crazy. That’s why, if I do nothing else with my horn on a given day, I play those long tones - and I try to play them with as much life and soul as I can. Soulful long tones? Yep. It’s all in my head and how I hear them.
◆ Fear
The fear is the one mentioned above- what if I am at the end of my ability? What if I can’t get those intervals down right or that lick to fall into place under my fingers? Maybe at my age I should just be satisfied with all that I have done in the past few years and be satisfied. I am afraid to fail, afraid to lose, afraid to not be able to grow and improve. So why try? I can recognize the craziness in that statement the minute I say it or write it. Yes, there may very well come the day when I am at the end, but a quick look at Herb Alpert (age 83) and Doc Servinsen (age 92) will quickly remind me that if I keep going I will grow!
◆ Exhaustion
This is a flip side of boredom which is a form of mental exhaustion. It comes because I have been working and working and getting nowhere. It is also possible to overwork your willpower which can lead to both mental and physical exhaustion. This leads, I think, to some of the leveling off of improvement or even the steps backward we take before making an growth jump. This means I have to take a look at how I’m practicing and how I may be over doing some aspect of it.
◆ Lack of direction
These all lead to this fourth reason for getting stuck- I don’t know for sure where I am going. I’ve lost my way, gotten off the path, been distracted. It is time to look at my goals and what I want to get out of- and give back to- my music. It is a two way street and I need to develop my self-awareness, mindfulness, and goal-setting.

These are not just specific to music. I mentioned in a previous post that I have difficulty at times in my physical exercise routine. When that happens I can look at these same four things to discover a possible underlying issue with my exercise, or my writing routine. Fortunately there are ways to deal with them after we have taken a look at ourselves and what we are in the midst of experiencing. I will deal with that next week.

Until then, find out where you may be stuck and what have been happening. It may be one of those four things above, or it may be something very specific to your situation. Don’t be afraid of it- none of us can grow unless we look at what may be holding us back. No matter what, keep moving; don’t stop. Go back to the basics until you discover what you need at this moment in time.