Earlier today I was told that I have been kind of non-wordy here on the pmPilgrim blog.
That is true.
For some reason or another I have not been inspired. I even went to my favorite Barnes and Noble this evening- and wrote nothing in my trusty Moleskine journal.
My mind is wordless.
I am not being creative.
Instead I have been working on throwing papers and old pictures away in prep for a move this fall. We have been out buying a new car. We went to the Guthrie for a play last weekend- The Sunshine Boys, about aging actors.
None of which sounds like good enough reasons to be wordless. Unless I am afraid that the words that travel into my fingers onto the page or screen will be reminders of the changes that we tend to go through as we get older. I know that 70 is the new 50 and all that other stuff. I know that things are different today than in my parents' generation.
But when you buy a new car and realize that if you keep it as long as you kept the one being traded in, you will be solidly in your mid-70s (your 8th decade) well, that is humbling and sobering and a wake-up call. When you hear that the last time London hosted the Olympics was a much different world- and it was the year you were born, it is stunning.
I am trying not to focus on my upcoming 64th birthday next Saturday. But that is like being told "Don't think about elephants." The first thing you think about is elephants. This is probably the most difficult birthday I have had in a long time. Maybe the Beatles' ancient song sets me up for it, but 64 feels more significant than any of the decades. I liked 30- it was when I felt to be finally an adult. At 40- on a hot summer night- I played my first ever trumpet solo then proceeded to sobriety. 50 was fun with my daughter about to be a senior in high school and lots of activities. At 60 I did my 60 mile bike ride.
Looking ahead I really am still planning a week-long biking adventure on Spain's Camino de Santiago de Compostela in the next two years.
Ah, it just came to me. I am about to celebrate my 64th by going to the Baseball Hall of Fame in August with my brother...
... as well as do some fun sightseeing in Philadelphia and New York with my wife. I have never been to the tourist places in Philly.
I can get out of my funk and think about what's yet to come. Stop being focused on the lost and the finished. Celebrate it and keep on moving.
Which is where the power of words comes in. Write- and you can often find what you need to find. It's right there in your heart or mind or soul. The fingers are waiting to translate.
Go for it.
Oh- and thanks for listening.