Fifth Wednesday in Lent
The third of the disciplines that Jesus mentioned in the Sermon on the Mount passage from Ash Wednesday (Matt 6) is the one on:

• Fasting

16"When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show men they are fasting. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full.

Fasting. Every time I read or hear about it I think that I should try it. I have felt that way for years and years. I bought – and even read – a number of books on the subject or reflected on it after reading Richard Foster’s classic Celebration of Discipline. It sounds like such a good idea.

Until I try it. Which I have done numerous times over these same years. And all I think about is eating. Or patting myself on the back for trying it. Or being afraid that I might get a headache from not eating. Or just generally being obsessive about it.

Fasting is a discipline of self-deprivation in order to free oneself from the control of the body or of things in order to re-focus on God. Or as described in Wikipedia:

The "acceptable fast" is discussed in the biblical Book of Isaiah, chapter 58:3-7, and is discussed metaphorically. In essence, it means to abstain from satisfying hunger or thirst, and any other lustful needs we may yearn for. The blessings gained from this are claimed to be substantial. Christian denominations that practice this acceptable fast often attest to the spiritual principles surrounding fasting and seek to become a testament to those principles.

Muslims believe that fasting is more than abstaining from food and drink. It also includes abstaining from any falsehood in speech and action, from any ignorant and indecent speech, and from arguing and fighting, and lustful thoughts. Therefore, fasting helps develop good behavior.

It would be interesting to know if people with different personality types (as in Myers-Briggs) or things like ADD/ADHD have more difficulty fasting. I know I have always had this problem. Oh, it’s easy to skip breakfast or a lunch, but two meals in a row is tough.

So what’s my answer? Here’s a discipline recommended by Jesus and practiced by religious people of all kinds all over the world probably since the beginning of time. Why am I different? What can I do in order to be a more disciplined or more faithful follower of God?

Perhaps in that question is the beginning of my search. Perhaps I need to look more deeply into what is within me that doesn’t like being hungry. (Other than natural human desires.) Perhaps I need to explore in prayer and meditation the reasons why all this has come to be such a struggle.

And perhaps (rationalizing?) it is not a requirement of the faith, but rather one more of those disciplines that we can practice that will bring us closer to God and more aware of our need for him on a daily basis. Each year at Lent I face this. Maybe one year I will be able to do something about it.