Tuning Slide #5.24- Professional or Procrastination

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

The difference between an amateur and a professional is in their habits. An amateur has amateur habits. A professional has professional habits. We can never free ourselves from habit. But we can replace bad habits with good ones.
— Steven Pressfield

Little did I realize when I set up my schedule of posts for these months that I would need to hear what I am writing about today. I originally planned this post as another reminder of what the differences are between “amateur” and “professional.” It is not, as I have said before, about getting paid versus not, it is about attitude, perspective, and mindset. It’s in the things like these from Jeff Goins at Medium:

✓ 1. Amateurs wait for clarity. Pros take action.
You have to know what you are before you can figure out what you want to do.
✓ 2. Amateurs want to arrive. Pros want to get better.
You have to become a student long before you get to be a master
✓ 3. Amateurs practice as much as they have to. Pros never stop.
You have to practice even, maybe especially, when it hurts.
✓ 4. Amateurs leap for their dreams. Pros build a bridge.
You have to build a bridge, not take a leap. It’s the daily practice. The amateur is concerned with the big break, whereas the pro is more focused on delaying immediate gratification in exchange for long-term success.

All well and good. Over these last five to six years I have made many changes and improvements. I have learned to take action, to strive for ongoing practice, to build bridges through that practice toward where I am going. It has been an exciting and fulfilling journey. I have finally accepted that being a professional musician is not just about making a living and having a career in music. It is living in those things in all of one’s life. That is how I grew and improved in my careers as a pastor and counselor. It is where I am still going in my life as a musician.

But it is not a straight line of constant improvement. In the past, when I reached certain points of “being stalled” or “plateaued” I just kept moving. The answers usually came. "Don’t stop" may be the best advice at those moments. More is coming.

Well, today I am writing to remind myself of all this in ways far beyond just my music. I noticed this especially when I reviewed the following from behavioral psychology writer Mayo Oshin (link):

▪ 1. Amateurs wait to feel inspired. Professionals stick to a schedule.
Professionals don’t let their feelings dictate their actions. They intentionally create and stick to a schedule come rain or shine.

▪ 2. Amateurs focus on goals. Professionals focus on habits.
Amateurs struggle with ‘resistance’ and procrastination because of their intense focus on the end result. Professionals treat success like a marathon and not a sprint. They focus on developing the habits that will naturally help them to achieve their goals as a by-product.

▪ 3. Amateurs strive to achieve. Professionals strive to improve.
The professional understands that achievement is simply an indication of how much they’ve improved. They are focused on continuous growth and seek to find new ways to improve themselves.

▪ 4. Amateurs stall after failure. Professionals grow after failure.
Amateurs try to avoid failure at all costs. They fear criticism and worry too much about what people would think if they failed. Professionals treat failure and criticism like a scientist—discarding the irrelevant information and using the relevant feedback to become better at what they do.

[Mumble] How did I know that I would be where I am today when I set up this schedule back six weeks ago? [Mumble] There must be some outside force that plans these just to keep me from getting too comfortable. [Grumble] I guess I need to live what I suggest. [Grumble one last time.]

Over the past month or so, I hit one of my walls in much of what I am doing.
~~ My trumpet practice routine got sidetracked by minor surgery. In my frustration, I have struggled with getting centered again.
~~ My workout routine got shifted by travel, though I have managed to keep my weight-loss goal steady, though at a plateau.
~~ My writing of this blog and two other projects started to become a chore, so I would just put it off. Part of this is because I am in a different setting than usual and haven’t gone to “The Office”, i.e. the coffee shops where I do most of my writing. I even thought of putting The Tuning Slide on hiatus for a few weeks. [Horrors!]

It reminds me of the saying I used here several years ago:

◆ How you do anything is how you do everything.

Over these weeks something (it) has shown up in anything and everything.

Okay, it is procrastination.

I need to name it- and the first step is to know that I am procrastinating and I need to do something about it. I need to remind myself that this isn’t an either-or choice. I am by nature one who likes to be inspired, to set goals, to achieve, and to avoid failure. Because I will bring that into my “pro” attitude, I remind myself that:

⁃ Professionals get inspired because of following schedules.
⁃ Professionals have goals as well as habits (which help them reach their goals).
⁃ Professionals achieve because they improve.
⁃ Professionals do get stalled, but they keep moving.

I go back to Mayo Oshin’s post. She gives a two-part answer to becoming (and staying) “pro”:

◆ Thou shalt commit to a schedule.
A schedule is simply a pre-commitment to consistently put in your ‘reps’ and hours in your craft. Just like any new habit, your willpower and ability to delay gratification will also affect your consistency levels.
◆ Thou shalt believe that thou art ‘Pro.’
This is why it’s so important to shift your identity. You have the power right now to believe that you’re a professional. [But] To say that you believe you’re a pro isn’t enough because actions speak louder than words. Prove to yourself that you’re really a pro and do the things that a pro would do every day.

Having been found guilty of procrastination and inspired by these directions, three final questions that I need to answer from Oshin’s article.

• Am I committed to being a professional in any area of my life?
• Is there anything holding me back from going pro?
• What can I do to create the schedule and identity of a pro?

Take some time this week to look at those questions for yourself. I will, and then continue this next week. Be honest, rigorously honest, with yourself. It always helps to do that since we are good at keeping the truth from ourselves, though we usually know it’s BS.

You can never be true to others, if you keep on lying to yourself.
― Gift Gugu Mona

Tuning Slide 4.35- Health is Physical and Mental

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

A man should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day of his life, in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.
― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I’ll start with a confession from last week- I didn’t get to post anything. We have been traveling on our end of the winter “vacation” and things were going in all kinds of wonderful directions in Savannah, GA, that it never happened.

Two weeks ago I started a three-part series on life lessons to take away from being a musician. In that one I riffed on a post from the website, The Odyssey Online, where Amanda Gribbin reflected on Eight Life Lessons Through Music.

This week I turn to the website, Musicnotes Now.

[From their page: Musicnotes Now – A Noteworthy Blog for Seriously Fun Musicians. Bringing music lovers the latest news, tips, and products to help nourish their love for music.
“Now” is a blog brought to you by Musicnotes – the world leader in digital sheet music.]

There I discovered a post titled:
17 Surprising Health Benefits of Playing an Instrument

In the first section they talk about possible physical benefits including improved breathing, exercise, improved immune response, hearing, and stress reduction. The one item that I have had some experience with centers on the breathing and muscle improvement. I am a whiz at your normal, everyday standard “plank” exercise. My trainer was amazed the first time I did a solid two minute plank. He commented that not too many people my age (or even younger) could do a two-minute plank. A few weeks later we were discussing it again and he said, “I wonder if part of why you can do that so well is because you are a trumpet player and need to use your core?” I don’t know if that is true or not, but it gives some truth to the physical side of playing an instrument.

Perhaps the clearest benefits, and life lessons, however, can be found in the second area mentioned on the website, the mental benefits. Here these are with the comments from the article:

✓ Mental Performance
⁃ Playing music is like doing a workout for every part of your brain. It helps improve your mental performance and memory. There’s even evidence that music can help a patient’s brain recover from a stroke, as well as slow the onset of dementia and Alzheimer’s disease.

✓ Coordination
⁃ Using your fingers, hands, and feet in a rhythmic manner for a sustained amount of time, while also being conscious of playing the correct tones, can be a challenge for even the most coordinated people. Over time though, playing music refines your motor skills that go beyond the hand-eye.

✓ Time Management
⁃ Learning an instrument requires practice, of course! But more specifically, it requires consistency and routine. Figuring out how to fit practice into your busy schedule and really stick to it helps you develop better time management and organization skills.

✓ Reading Skills
⁃ Reading music helps strengthen your ability to process information by creating new connections between the synapses in your brain. As a result, reading and absorbing information from other sources becomes a lot easier.

✓ Listening Skills
⁃ Learning music doesn’t just improve your ability to hear details; it also makes you better at listening. Whether you’re practicing on your own or playing with other people, you have to listen for timing, expression, and whether you’re in tune. This can make you a better listener even in everyday conversations as well.

✓ Concentration
⁃ Focus is a necessary part of learning an instrument. Improving your musical skills forces you to use all the parts of your brain involved in concentration, making you better able to concentrate in other life situations. This is another reason why music is beneficial for those with disorders like ADD (-Link)

These are not empty ideas. There is a great deal of research as well as anecdotal observation that can point in these directions. Now, one must always ask, are people who improve in these ways drawn to music because they can do that? No, I think it is more than that. Sometimes I think there are people drawn to music because they know it will benefit them.

For example, I am aware of a young person who had some significant learning concerns, possibly on the autism spectrum. They were somewhat reserved and uncertain. Somewhere around 5th or 6th grade they decided they wanted to be a trumpet player. We all know of the reputation we trumpet players have for being front and center and obnoxiously self-centered. That does not seem to be the best way to go for a person who appears just the opposite. Yet, I knew that this young person was about to do something remarkable. I was right. I saw them regularly over the next six or seven years and the change was clear and consistent. They became a trumpet player in all the best ways and expanded into other musical endeavors. It worked to change this person and help them find new and exciting ways to enter into social and school situations.

Yes, it’s an anecdote, an observation made from short and infrequent contacts. But it is not unusual as the above ideas propose.

So, for you and me- we are already musicians. We have learned how to play the instrument. Perhaps we have had to struggle with time-management or focus. Perhaps we know that we could be sharper in our mental performance- we get lazy thinking periods- or we just get lazy. Is that how we want to live? Is that going to help us move forward in music AND in all the other areas of our lives?

I have learned more from being a musician about living and thinking and development. I know that musicians (and often other arts-types) have to do a great deal of work to become more than just mediocre. We know we can do it! We have been doing it. Some of us for a few months or years, some of us for decades. We are not done yet, but we are moving.

Probably in the end, the most important life lesson we get from music is that we can succeed. It is the sense of achievement that builds confidence that helps us move to other levels of achievement and on and on.

Nike had it right, “Just do it.” Then, when we have done it, keep doing it. Why? Because you know you can do it!

The Tuning Slide 3.16- Avoiding the Extremes

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

Happiness is not a matter of intensity

but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.

-Thomas Merton

We’re thinking about musician etiquette this month. Really, it boils down to being a good musician. Remember the four things we are to focus on - in this order…

• The music.
• Other musicians
• The audience
• Ourselves.

"Etiquette" is being a good colleague who displays “musicianship”. That brings all four into play on a regular basis. Last week I looked at how our actions and behaviors in both rehearsals and performances can get in the way of all these things. If we do not practice good musical etiquette in general:

• The music will suffer. It won’t have the quality we want it to have.
• Our colleagues will suffer. They won’t be able to count on us to be equal members of the group.
• The audience will suffer. The performances won’t have the zip and fun that they want to hear.
• In the end we will suffer. We will get fed up with what is happening, especially if we blame it on others, and give up.

Having set that as the foundation of what we are aiming at, here are some of the things that we trumpet players do to others- and to ourselves.

Item #1- and at the top of our list of trumpet player sins.
Wanting to get to that great and wonderful Double High C.

It is the goal, the aim, the end of all being in the great trumpet room in the sky! For most of us it is summed up in one word:

Maynard! (For non-trumpet players, that would be Maynard Ferguson- the trumpet screamer to beat all trumpet screamers.)

To be a great trumpet player we all think we have to play high and loud. Like Maynard. Our hero!

Which of course means that if we can’t play the way-up-in-the-stratosphere register, there is something wrong with us as trumpet players. Many of us have fought that internal self-esteem killer most of our lives. Then we work- and overwork- our embouchure to reach those rare heights and we end up playing hurt, which only makes it worse. I have a hunch that is why, in the end for many of us, our true icon of trumpet playing is Miles Davis who personified for many years the good solid sound of a trumpet- and even played with a Harmon mute! It was almost like he was saying to the world:

I can play loud; I choose not to.

One of the great solos of his was the solo on the classic cut- “So What”. It doesn’t go anywhere near the stratosphere; it has a solid, almost reserved sound. Looking at a transcription of it you might say, “What’s so hard about that?”

Until you try to play it. Most of us could spend a lifetime practicing that and still not get it as solid as Davis does.

Herb Alpert is in the same field as Davis. Davis was once quoted as saying that all he had to hear was a couple notes and he could tell it was Alpert. Which brings me to the lesson for all of us in trumpet- and musical- etiquette. It was one of the items on the Trumpet Camp reflection list. One of our goals is to

Have the same “sound” for everything I play

Davis, Alpert, Chet Baker, Lee Morgan, and any of the greats always have the same “sound”, the same quality and tone no matter what they play. It is their sound. And they don’t have to scream to make it heard. But for my money, the greatest at doing that today - and for most of the past 60+ years - is Doc Severinsen. Here is one of his best examples of not screaming yet managing the complete range of the horn. He plays in that stratosphere as if it were just your every day middle of the staff music.

Item # 2: Equipment
Trumpet players always seem to be playing around with equipment, looking for the perfect piece that will make us into the next great star. Usually it starts with the mouthpiece itself. Get two trumpet players together and they will have at least six opinions on mouthpieces, the advantages and disadvantages, why they use- or don’t use this one or that one. Not that there aren’t differences and different ones allow you to do different things. Not to mention that each of us has a slightly different physiology which may mean that certain mouthpieces work differently.

But in general my research seems to show that most people start with a “beginner” mouthpiece that usually comes with the horn. Eventually most move to the good, old, reliable Bach 3C (or equivalent) and stay with that for the rest of their lives or careers, whichever comes first. Should we look at other mouthpieces? I guess. But the thought that comes to mind is “If it seems too good to be true, it probably isn’t.”

That doesn’t mean that a change won’t work well at times. I had that happen starting about a year and a half ago. I tried one of the new Bach Commercial mouthpieces at a workshop. It was a modified “v” cup. It seemed to allow me some freedom at the upper register and an extended endurance. The problem was all they had was a “5mv” and I was nervous about moving from the “3” size. So I didn’t get it. Earlier this year I had a chance to try the “3 MV”. I gave it quite a workout. It was as good, or better than the “5 MV” I had tried earlier. I bought it.

This new mouthpiece has allowed greater dynamic and sound range, higher register, and endurance. Was it a mouthpiece version of the “placebo” effect? I don’t think so- for two reasons. When I first played it for my wife she heard the difference in tone and dynamic immediately. Then, a few months later I accidentally pulled the “3C” out of the bag without noticing. Since the rim size was the same I didn’t feel the difference- until I realized my range and dynamic was off. At first I thought it was because I had been playing too much and was just tired. Then I realized it wasn’t the new mouthpiece. I switched and all the things that felt off went away.

But that alone isn’t what did it or allowed me to do it. What does it is another from the Trumpet Workshop list:

Learning to hear

By allowing me to hear a cleaner sound with greater dynamic and range I began to know what those notes should sound like. I like the sound of the “3MV” for me. I like hearing it and how it feels on my lip. It did not solve my “problems” and perhaps it gave me some new ones. (See next item.) But it did improve my ability to hear and that will always bring about an improvement in musicianship! The equipment we use is there to help us, it won’t do it for us.

The final item of trumpet sinful activities for this post:
Item #3: Balance.

Actually it’s the lack of balance that plagues us. It’s wanting to be a screamer the first time we pick up the horn. It’s wanting to be able to sound like Miles, or Maynard, or Doc without the years of practice. It’s wanting to be able to play loud for hours on end and getting pissed when we get tired- or worse- hurt. It’s wanting the equipment to save us or take us someplace we are still unable to go. Sure, if your valves don’t work smoothly you may never be able to play some of those amazing arpeggios. But a new horn may not be the problem- your present horn may be too dirty, your valves clogged, springs not working right.

Take the time to take care of the equipment and it will probably do what you need it to do. Sure, if you move into a new level of musicianship and career building you may need to upgrade the horn. But probably not. You are the musician that produces the sound. The horn or the valves or whatever doesn’t do it for you. Learn to balance your sound and work.

From our workshop list, this brings up:

Being efficient in playing

Efficiency is balance. If you strain and push constantly, you are not in balance and something will happen to your playing. If you want everything to happen yesterday, it won’t come tomorrow. Balance is taking care of your instrument so it doesn’t get so gunked up that its sound is compromised. Ignoring the basics of say the Arban’s first couple sections will put us out of balance with the whole range of what we want to do. Again, back to the video from Doc (above) the ability to play equally across the whole range of the horn is the result of balance.

Next week I’ll talk about personal balance and self care as it is part of our musicianship. That will get us into the greater aspects of what we can learn from being a “compleat musician”.

Until then, look for the balance, don’t only push to the extremes, but build the solid foundation and middle in order to support the greater sounds and range. Be efficient in order to be effective. Finally, nothing can do it for you.

The Tuning Slide: 2.27- Anxiety

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

I’ve written about performance anxiety before- and my 45 year battle with it. Last May I described what I have always considered my initial bout with it on a Memorial Day over 50 years ago. (I will repeat that post at the end of May, by the way.) Throughout this year I have continued to work on it and I am finding myself improving. I have sorted out some of the other issues like perfectionism, making a fool of myself, worry about what people will think, letting myself down, letting the other musicians down, letting the audience down, and on and on.

No wonder I get performance anxiety- that’s a lot of heavy-duty baggage I carry around to every performance.

One thing I have taken note of is that performance anxiety does not generally happen in rehearsals, although there have been exceptions. That usually happens a) in the larger groups when all of a sudden (as if I didn’t know it was coming? Right!) I have a part that stands out, and b) in a final rehearsal before a concert. In fact most of the time in rehearsal my self-improvement plan of the last two years has shown positive results for me. I am generally pleased with how things continue to fall into place. I more often than not leave a practice session feeling fulfilled and relaxed.

But some of the signs of the anxiety still show up in the performances- overly concerned with what’s going to happen, dry mouth, some nervousness, the feeling down deep somewhere that I’m about to blow it- again. It’s not happening as much as it used to, but it’s still there and I continue to tweak my methods.

Looking back in my notes from the Shell Lake Trumpet Workshop the other day I found this list of ways to deal with it. I don’t remember (and didn’t note) if this was from one particular lecture at the workshop or a combination of things from different places. If I am neglecting to give someone credit, my apologies. Let me know and I will give you the props for it. In any case, here is the basic note with my updates and thoughts about each as I have worked on it this past year.

To deal with performance anxiety:

• Don't be overly concerned about what other people think of you.
  They probably don’t even notice when things aren’t perfect. I have done some improvising- as part of the big band and at a jam session. I am looking to do more of that to help me continue to gain the skills of listening and translating it into the language of the trumpet. I am learning that when I do that, people are usually on my side and want me to do well. No one is sitting there saying, “I really want Barry to mess this up!”
• Put the performance in perspective
  One performance in terms of whole career? It’s a lot smaller deal than I am making it. Not to mention that I am not doing this as a career. In the while scheme of things any given performance is not all that earth-changing, especially at my level. Yes, there are performances that do make a difference, but most of them aren’t. By experiencing performing without anxiety, I can learn that I am able to perform better than I thought.
• Breathe. Be in the moment.
  I talk a lot about this- and can utilize it in many ways, except on stage! On stage it seems to enhance the concerns and anxiety instead of easing them. That probably means I need to practice my mindfulness with less depending on it. It does work, but it can’t if I focus my breathing on how I’m about to mess up. Relax- and tell Self One to just be quiet!
• Take the emotion from the music, not the other way around.
  We are the conduit. Let the music do the talking. Let the horn speak. This is part of the focus we seek in our practice. Did I say practice? I know that too often when practicing something more difficult or a solo part, I tend to look too much on the technical quality of what I am doing. By the time I get to a concert or gig the technical part shouldn’t be a problem. I should be moving well beyond that in my practice room and into the groove, emotion, rhythm, and style of the piece. In rehearsals I should be listening to how my part fits into the greater whole. Whether it is a concert band solo or improvising in a big band piece, I need to know the emotion of the music… and all music isn’t stuck in my emotion of anxiety.
• Think like someone else.
  Like Miles or Maynard? Well, maybe, but in reality what I almost have to do is begin to think like a person who can play the part- and play it well. I am not the bumbling musician that self one is convinced I am. I know what I am doing- again, especially if I have given practice the time and energy it needs.
• You are a person who plays trumpet, not a trumpet player who happens to be a person
  It’s like going in a circle- I am back to the first of these ideas. My personal dignity, worth, or self is not the trumpet, t’s in being who I am. THAT is what I want to share through the horn. I am learning how to do that, which makes it easier to put the anxiety aside.
• Have fun practicing!
  I do this because I enjoy it. I need to enjoy the music I make in practice as well. That is where self one learns to trust self two. Maybe I need to stop the tweaking of my plan to get over performance anxiety- and just learn to do it. No, not learn to do it- just do it. And that takes the ability to focus. We’ll get to that next week.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By the way, I am going to end year 2 of the Tuning Slide at the end of March. Last year I kept going and then ran into the idea of publishing it which entailed design and editing as well as the actual publishing. This year I’m going to be going at it a little differently. I will have more to say about that in a couple weeks. The posts will continue with repeating the jazz series from last summer before heading into some new ideas. Again, more on that in a few weeks. If anyone has anything you would like me to talk about in the next couple weeks, let me know.

Tuning Slide: Who Do You Hang With?

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

I want to be around people that do things. 

I don’t want to be around people anymore that judge 

or talk about what people do. 

I want to be around people that dream 

and support and do things.

― Amy Poehler

Let's be honest- trumpet players have a reputation. (Undeserved, I think. Well, maybe.... Okay, it's complicated.) The old joke:

How does one trumpet player greet another trumpet player?
Hi. I'm better than you.

The implication is very clear. Trumpet players think highly of themselves and believe that any other trumpet player they meet is obviously inferior to them. We might make an exception if we are meeting the first chair of the Chicago Symphony, Doc Severinsen, or the faculty at Shell Lake Trumpet Camp. That's our reputation- and at times- our attitude. I could go into some detail on that, but I will leave that to another week.

The problem with having that attitude is, as you might guess, that we always think we are surrounded by inferior musicians. If we are, each of us, the best around us, that means we have nothing to learn, nowhere to grow, and can become pretty damn obnoxious to be around.

Yes, there are players like that, and they aren't all trumpet players. But overall, my experience has often been that we are often more willing to be in a learning position as in a superior position. Learning takes humility which can be defined as "a willingness to learn." That does not mean that we take an inferior position any more than it means taking a superior position. It means that we enter into each other's musical presence with openness to what we have to learn- as well as share.

One of the quotable lines from Trumpet Camp last summer brought all this to mind:

Surround yourself with people who are better than you are.

I realized that this statement is as much about attitude as it is about musical ability. If you are the first chair in the top group at your school or in your community, chances are that you are a pretty good musician. It may very well be that overall you might be better than the other people in your section. But the attitude that could come with that can be downright destructive to the group making good music.

And it could get in the way of you discovering new ways of making music yourself.

If any of us project the kind of attitude that says "I'm the best!" the others will wonder what good they are to the group. If that obnoxious first chair looms over the proceedings like the great judge of the universe- I for example will hold back, play more timidly, see my part as a "small" part. Many of us have heard the comeback to that- there are no small parts, only small players. A "superior" musician among us, though, can make us feel "small." The section will never produce good music if that is the case.

In reality, thankfully, these type of trumpet players are few and far between. Oh, admittedly it might not seem that way at first when you hear them play or watch them in action. It is intimidating to many of us to play in a section, especially next to, one of these top quality players.  But once we get to know them, my experience has almost always been one of openness to assist me in growing. It's not about the other trumpet player's attitude- it's about mine! With that attitude on our part we can discover that this otherwise superior musician is weak in a certain area. They minimize the things they are not as proficient at and maximize the things they are good at.

That I can learn from!

When the better player is open to sharing and accepting a role as a leader, which they often are(!), the whole section gets better. I appreciate the section leader who suggests I take a lead that will push me. It says the leader believes I can do it. I will work harder in the group when the section leader gives us all the "Thumbs Up!" after the concert and says we did well because any of us could have played the lead- and played our parts appropriately.

For those who are at least arguably the best player in their section, to take that to heart as grandiosity will get in the way of your ability as well. You will get easily bored and move on if no one else around you has anything to teach you. You can become a prima donna- a very temperamental person with an inflated view of their own talent or importance.You will become a point of dissension in your group. You, even as good as you are, could very well contribute to your section or group being less musical.

It is interesting that so often across these months of writing this blog I have moved away from technical musical learning. I have often moved to more general ideas that, applied specifically to trumpet playing can have significant impact. One of these, over and over is summed up in "attitude." And attitudes are choices. We can be educated into good or bad attitudes; we can make certain attitudes habits. We all know the perpetual "wet blanket" who never does anything but whine. We also know the cheerleader type who is always up and perky.

These, and all attitudes in-between, will color how we see the world. There's nothing new in saying this. The wisdom is as old as humans who began observing their neighbors' behavior. They then decided they liked being around people with certain behaviors and stayed away from those who others. Or we discover that we may gravitate to those with the same attitude, you know, misery loves company, other people who are as miserable as you are and love to complain about it.

That can be more than just difficult. It can be downright unhealthy and keep us stuck.

Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

One more thought came to mind. What if you are the best player around? What if there is no one you can easily get together with that is better than you? I can think of a couple of options.

• Find a teacher in some nearby community who might be willing to take you on as a student. It might not be able to be done weekly, but set up a schedule
• Gather other musicians who would be willing to "jam" or even become a group and push each other. Don't be the "leader". Be just another group member as you seek to blend in with the whole group. Dream with them, have common visions, don't be satisfied for the "good" which is almost always the enemy of both the "better" and the "best" you can be.
• Find camps, workshops, jam sessions, that you can attend.
• Listen, listen, and then listen more to great recordings. All types of recordings. Watch videos online or on the various media. Find lessons online that may be in an area that you are less proficient. 
• Go back to the first item and do it again.

It's not always convenient or easy, but if we are committed to being quality musicians, no matter the level of our ability (!!!), we will find the ways.

The Tuning Slide: Your Story

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

Music is philosophy. Every chord, every word tells a story. If you listen you will know its meaning.

-Kamanda Ndama (African Musician, Philosopher, Poet and Songwriter

Composer, arranger, and educator Stanley Curtis has a post on his blog Trumpet Journey that talks about the three "S"s, the three key elements he believes all great trumpet players have. They are simply

• Story
• Song and
• Support

As to the first, Story, Curtis writes:

Each of us has a unique story. That story may be an actual account of some event, or even the story of our life. But we also have our own stories that we keep coming back to, such as “beauty is great,” or “old things are cool” or “technology is what I’m about.” These are our thematic points that our choices point to.

Some might say that part of the "story" is your own personal mission statement, your view of what it is you see as your life's mission. That is your guiding principle. Most of us never think much about that, but we all live our personal "Theme and Variations" in what we do and how we go about our lives.

Most of us are more than familiar with the Arban's "Variations on Carnival of Venice." There's an introduction, the theme and then the incredible variations. Another famous similar composition is Charles Ives' "Variations on America". Throughout each composition the basic theme repeats, of course, but all kinds of styles and flourishes are added. For the listener the goal is to see the connections with the  original theme. For the performer and/or composer it is to make those connections real and interesting without going so far afield that the original concept is lost.

That's the "story" we each continue to "riff" on as we go through our lives. Sometimes the riff is fast and furious, putting as much energy as we can into it. Other times it slows down and floats along with ease. Then it switches to a minor key or some odd set of tonalities. Yet, underneath it is "you", your theme. As Curtis says above this "theme" or "story" is what informs the choices and that these choices support.

He goes on:

Choices about repertoire, style, equipment, venues, and even the clothes we wear when we perform can help create our own story and the story that each generation needs to hear. Many players perform to a story that is going on inside their heads. As listeners, we can sense that something dramatic is happening.

Choices. We all make them all the time. Most of the time we don't even think about them. Most of the time the choices we make fall into the pattern of our story. It's who we are. Why did we choose to play trumpet, instead of any of the other instruments? How does "being a trumpet player" fit into our view of our story? Why did we continue to play the trumpet? Many people learn to play instruments but many quit after college, if not before.

Last year at trumpet camp there were those who are planning on making music their career, while others will have other professions. Yet there is something about the trumpet that obviously fits our individual stories. Why?

That's the choice. It helps define us. It fills a place in our lives that nothing else quite does. How then do we tell that story in our music?

Think about your story. What is it? Where do you want to go? How does music help you do that? How does that come out in your music? Spend some time reflecting on that and practice your story this week.

-Link for above quotes from Trumpet Journey

The Tuning Slide: Inner Game 2: Trust

Weekly Reflections on Life and Music

The nerves are a problem on trumpet,
because when you mess up everyone can hear it.

Just remember most people are too polite
to say anything about it.

That should calm your nerves.
-- Wynton Marsalis

I have introduced the background of the Inner Game in a couple earlier posts. In the Inner Game of Music Barry Green adapted the original work of W. Timothy Gallwey. Basically Gallwey and Green describe two parts of who we are, Self 1 and Self 2. Simply put,

• If it interferes with your potential, it is Self 1.
• If it enhances your potential, it is Self 2.

The next part then is to learn and develop three fundamental “inner game” skills. Candace Brower on the Albuquerque Music Teacher’s blog writes:

Green advises us that if we want to reach our full potential as musicians, we need to learn three fundamental skills: (1) awareness, (2) will, and (3) trust. Awareness is about being fully aware of the sounds, sights, and feelings of playing while avoiding self-judgments that could distort our perceptions. Will is about setting goals, then using the feedback we get from being aware to reach our goals through a process of trial and error. Trust is about letting go of self-judgment and of the physical act of playing to Self 2 and trusting Self 2 to get it right.

Without specifically dealing with the Inner Game, I have spent quite a bit of time already on awareness (mindfulness, attention, etc.) and setting goals. So what’s this thing with trust? Green writes that this is

Not blind trust, but the trust that comes after hard work, and the trust that comes from knowing there is music inside you….

In order to achieve our ultimate goal and enter the state of relaxed concentration where we are one with the music, there is one more skill we need. We need to trust ourselves.

There are, according to Green, three major obstacles to trust:

• Worries about your self-image,
• The feeling that things are out of your control, and
• Doubts and fears about your own ability.

These feed Self 1’s objections to our playing well. Any of these can creep in and interfere with our music. Let's look at each as Green talks about them.

• Self-image
  "Music is a performing art," says Green. He then says the secret to getting beyond self-image is to give "yourself the character and emotions of the music. You become the music, not yourself." This is like being an actor playing a part. The goal of the actor is to express the character not their own personality. So it is with music. We come to accept our role as "interpreters of the composer's music."
  
  Okay- easier said than done, especially when we are playing a solo. Our image as a performer can be at stake, we think, if we flub it. If we keep aware of the fact that it is not about us, we are well along the way.
  
  
• Out of control
  Self 1 wants to keep control and make sure everything is going the way it wants. Letting go of control is then the direction to go in our learning. How do we learn to "let go" to Self 2?
  
  That depends to a great extent on the awareness, goal-setting, and preparation work we have been doing. It is based on trusting ourselves. Why should we? Because we have had years of listening and playing; we have had years of physical training of our embouchure, breathing, fingering; and we have been storing all kinds of information in our nervous system to respond when needed. Every one of us has known that moment when we stop worrying and let go to the music. That is the moment when we are in "the groove" - and it works. That's trusting ourselves. We are not in control- and don't need to be- because Self 2 and the music are.
  
  
• Doubting our abilities
  Hard to believe that a trumpet player will ever doubt his or her ability. That sure doesn't match our perceived self-image and personality. But we didn't start that self-assured about our ability nor do we always have it conquered. But really, what's the worst that could happen? Self 1 will be good at making a catastrophe out of it, but really, what is the worst that is most likely to happen? Chances are it won't be anywhere near as bad as good, old Self 1 thinks.
  
  What's the best that could happen? Probably a more likely prospect than the worst. Plus, unless there is a recruiter from the New York Philharmonic or the Canadian Brass sitting in the audience the best that could happen is most likely the warmth of having done a job well.

Many years ago my daughter and I were pondering our first ever roller coaster ride. She was 8 or 9 and I was in my early 40s. I had not ridden a coaster in decades; she never. We sat on a bench where we could watch the coaster we were considering. I counted the seconds to the top. I counted the seconds of the first drop. I timed the whole ride. We asked each other the questions about worst and best. Could we survive for those couple seconds it took to drop? Would I be way too nervous to bear the tension of the ride to the top? Would we get sick? (Probably not- and it wouldn't last long if we did.) Would we like it? (Probably- but if not, we just don't have to do it again.) We would be completely out of control. (But strapped in.)

We went on the ride.

And then got back in line to do it again. For the next hour. The worst didn't happen, but the best did. We had, in the end, only one real decision to make- did we trust the people who built, maintain, and operate the ride? Just like needing to trust my own ability to play.

Self-trust is the result of our practice and techniques we learn. That crazy run in Tchaikovsky's "Finale to Symphony #4" doesn't look quite as impossible when you realize it is just a variation on all those scales you have been doing for the past years. The solo in Holst's "Song Without Words" from Holst's "Second Suite" isn't quite as scary when you have listened to it for months and done some innovations on how it is constructed and you can see it's form in your mind.

Self-trust. Do you believe you can do it? Have you worked on being able to do it? Have you set goals, formal or informal to be ready to do it? Have you allowed you and the music to meld into a unique idea?

If so, you can do it.

If not, don't quit, just go back and work some more. But remember, sooner or later we will have to be ready. Do it. You know you can.

The player needs to be able to forget about himself. This is when real communication begins. For with the elimination of the self, he is able to reach the very core of the music, and is free to transmit it. 

-Kato Havas

[Footnote: Ms. Brower in the blog post cited above gives a very good counter argument about the seeming “bad guy” status that Green gives to Self 1. She focuses instead on Galleway’s original idea that the purpose of the inner game is to bring Self 1 and Self 2 into harmony with each other. (How’s that for a good musical idea?) I agree with Ms. Brower and will do some more on this and the insights from neurologists about the brain in a future post.]